The still small voice of the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said just stay here, I got out of my truck and I went back to the ropes course I sat there for what seemed like hours waiting to talk to the Lord in putty I asked him if anybody cares I was alone lost in the wilderness crying out. Jason came over and asked what it was all about. I was struggling but someone talked to me. I sat there a while longer contemplating what the next step would be and the young man named John came over to me and said “ hey Mr. Brooks you are JD,s dad right. I think you should do the ropes course”. and he gave me a hug I broke. Healing was happening. He put the harness on me snugged me in and gave me another hug. I did the ropes course on the top of the spaghetti wire crossing between the two trees the wind blew over me and cut To the core of my existence and filled me with a peace like never before. An ocean of waves releasing freedom washed over me and set me free at that moment I knew I was forgiven knew I could forgive and I knew I was loved.
As the day started at Bear Paw Camp listening to Brian Jennings’ sermon the Holy Spirit was talking to me in regards to an offense that was done 25 years ago that had built a stronghold in my relationship, I had not forgiven the person that violated something so dear to me. It took 25 years to break me I was finally ready to forgive. Brian mentioned his story of how he forgave the man that took his mother. I finally was ready and truly forgave this person I was able to forgive all. The remainder of the afternoon continued with great blessings and breakthroughs from God. The following morning I woke up earlier than I have in years without my alarm clock praising and worshiping God. I drove over to Bear Paw Camp for the second day Pastor Bill was scheduled to give his session, again striking home. I was defeated and broken and desperate I need that refreshing Holy Spirit to fill me up bad. Depression and complete letdown had sunk into my heart I walked out to my truck got in my truck and was planning on leaving and going up in the mountains and disappearing.
